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“Tight as Lamont and Rollo”

. . . Is a key line in this middling non-seminal quasi-classic from Tha’ Alkaholiks (I wanted to type “The Alcoholics” but my Urban Dictionary spell-checker keeps it real.)

At some point in this melodious romp through the hazy fog of inebriation-inspired poor judgment, the lead Rap dude, Tash, or the “Rap-singer Tash” as the New York Times used to call them, says the following:

“The freshest, yes it’s, the rhymer with the bottle
Kickin it with my homie like Lamont do with Rollo
Live at the Apollo, they still couldn’t do it
Cause even in New York the crew be buzzin off the fluid”

Now, Sanford and Son debuted in 1972, lasting five years and 164 episodes until 1977, though it is still a staple of some ethnically-themed networks that will go unnamed.

This, my friends, is a picture of one Rollo Larson

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Eddie Haskell to Lamont’s younger Cleaver in the Watts update of Leave it to Beaver (please send royalties to my Isle of Man account if *that* ever gets made.)

Yet, when executing a search for “Lamont and Rollo,” this is the first thing that popped up

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Yes, that’s right, a Lamont design Rollo Ribbed Vase.

What?

It is has been built with “Textures have been carved into reclaimed teak, then covered with leaf and natural lacquer. To create Gilded Cinnabar, a beautiful finish exclusive to LAMONT, the vessels are covered with cinnabar lacquer, gilded with silver leaf and rubbed back by hand before a final lacquer. Available in Velvet Black, Negoro Red and Gilded Cinnabar.”

If this doesn’t represent the chickens of marketing synergy coming home to roost, my friends, then someone in this world didn’t name their son Beaver.

Group hug, OB over and out.

Stevie P Makes The Music With His Mouth

Lightly Used Negligee: Your Best Offer Entertained…In Style

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Found lilting seductively on the warm breath of an afternoon breeze…I wasn’t joking about the, um, intimacy of stoop sales in these parts. I’m not up on my lingerie terms, is this actually a negligee? A camisol? Teddy? Anyone?

Electra Woman and Dyna Girl vs. QOTSA

Glitter Rock and Sideman mesmerize Electra Woman and Dyna Girl with Run Pig Run.

Sparrow Devours Dragonfly In Chelsea

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Hard to tell from the grainy blackberry pictures, but witnessed a sparrow chowing down on a sizable dragonfly (above and to the left of sparrow in first picture) on 18th Street. Sparrow was wrestling with it (the blur in the second image is the dragonfly getting shaken in the bird’s beak) and breaking off chunks. More unsettling for some reason than the time I saw a red-tailed hawk take out a squirrel in Stuy Town.

At What Point Does This Become Littering?

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I don’t know the first thing about computer programming and will defer to my more technological colleague here, but is there anyone anywhere on the face of the earth who might happen by this doorstep and find what looks to be an antique set of IBM Basic manuals useful? I put stuff out on the sidewalk myself before throwing it out sometimes, but personally I would relegate manuals for outmoded computer languages (isn’t it called HSALM or something now??) in the same category as lightly used undergarments for sidewalk-giveaway classification purposes.

My Signature Gift for Park Slope Birthday Parties

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Shopping for kid birthday presents is easy if you just buy the same damn gift every time. And I don’t know why, but I get a wrinkle of pleasure in gifting Monopoly Jr. Firstly, I think this version is more fun than its adult counterpart. Case in point, when you land on a space you acquire, by default, the rights to erect a concession stand or ticket booth or some other such profit generator. I guess I also look forward to the stilted thank you notes I get along the lines of “my child and I very much enjoy your gift and the valuable lessons it teaches of property acquisition and exploitation…”

The Yung And The Feckless

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All dialogue verbatim.

Hip Hop Twitter Watch: Yung Berg

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The Yungin crowdsources dinner.

Unless they mean Sarah Lawrence Class of ‘51

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Incongruous online ad placement is nothing new; this one made me chuckle though.